The more I learn about relational skills and relational circuits, the more I look for examples of them! Sometimes I find the examples of when they are OFF and not being used, and sometimes I find examples of when relational skills are being used and relational circuits are clearly on.
My brain learns best when it sees examples. Actually, to be even clearer, my brain learns BEST when it sees examples in real life.
But sometimes, we don’t have many real life examples around us. (or perhaps we just don’t recognize them yet).
While reading Joy Starts Here, I am definitely in agreement that too much time in the “cloud” is really bad for community and relationships as a whole. Unfortunately, my family LOVES the cloud. Much of our “quality time” has been going to the movies or watching favorite TV shows together. It would feel like I was abandoning my family if I just stopped doing that altogether.
Recently I asked Jesus where he was when I was watching TV with my family. You know what? He was right there with me. He was laughing when I was laughing, and enjoying the way that my daughter and I would look at each other and smile after finding the same things funny, or the way that we would both get misty eyed at the same time in response to a tender scene. He was ok with the way that we were glad to be together while watching TV.
Does he want me to only watch TV with my family... of course not! There’s lots of other things we do together that are apart from the cloud, but since we are glad to be together, even while participating in “cloud” activities, we might as well see what we can learn from it and have some fun with it!
So, today let’s have some fun! I have a list of my TOP 10 TV/Movie clips that demonstrate relational skills moments!! Let’s see if you can spot which skills these moments either display or display a LACK thereof?
Choose from these skills as you watch these clips:
Skill 1: Share Joy (Facial expression and voice tones amplify “We’re glad to be together”
Skill 3: Form bonds for 2 (synchronize attachments)
Skill 5: Form Family Bonds
Skill 4: Create Appreciation
Skill 9: Take a breather: timing when to disengage
Skill 11: Return to Joy from the big 6 negative emotions
Skill 15 Quiet Interactively
Relational Circuits are on: able to be open, flexible, interested, self-reflective, able to stay connected, able to receive, process, problem solve, respond, explore, understand and join in with others.
(some clips may have more than 1)
10. Seinfeld: The Soup Nazi
9. Parenthood: Amber tells her grandfather she’s pregnant
Slide to start at 30:23 end at 31:34
8. Friends: Monica and Rachel fight (some minor language)
Slide to start at 1:57
end at :37
6. Lord of the Rings- Rivendell scene
Slide to start at :43
5. Cheaper by the Dozen- (baby gets a name)
Slide to start at :58
4. Fresh Prince of Bel-Air: Uncle Phil with Will after his father leaves. (some minor language)
3. How I met your mother: ending a fight
End at :18
2. Forrest Gump: Lt. Dan makes peace with God
Slide to start at 16s
1. Return to Narnia
Slide to start at 1 min.
What skills did you find or see missing?!